Broken Me.

 

The saddest end to a relationship is one where you have to break up with somebody when you’re still in love with them. It sounds bizarre but it happens, because the truth is, as powerful and as thrilling and as wonderful as it may be, love isn’t always enough and to be in love doesn’t always mean you’re happy. You can continue to love someone even after they’ve hurt you, but you know deep inside yourself that it won’t ever be the same again, so at some point, you have to let them go. When is the right time? You never know. That’s the sad part, too. You just have to walk to the edge of it all and jump, learning to grow back the wings you once had on the way down.

Image result for teens crying in darkness

I remember the day when we broke up at 5 in the morning. The whole night we kept on arguing and finally we ended up.

I was all numb. I didn’t even cry. I kept on thinking about him. I have hurt him so much. I kept on thinking that he must be in pain. He must be crying. He must be doing this, doing that. A week passed and I was still thinking about him day and night.

And then I got a call from my friend and what she said to me was heartbreaking. My heart just skipped a beat.I was in tears. I couldn’t help but cry. I hung up the phone locked up myself in the room and sat their crying.I couldn’t control my emotions. I was mentally disturbed.

She said me something about him. She said he proposed her.!

I cried and then I called her back to know everything and what exactly happened.

She said he proposed her and said he liked her from the beginning itself. And the beginning actually meant the beginning of my relationship with him. She even told that he first wanted to talk to her but at that point of time she was in relationship with some one else, so he choose me. It meant that I was his second choice, much likely a backup plan.

And he was my first choice.

The difference was he was trying to love me. And I was in love with him, in love with his flaws, in love with his imperfections, in with his smile, in love with his everything.

How can he move on so easily. Just with in a week after the breakup he found his next love. His love was so weak towards me. Here I couldn’t get him out of my mind and there he threw me out his life. Not just this but he even found some one else and she was non other than my own friend.

I had many questions in my mind but I never tried to contact him. I knew if I did I would be in tears while listening to him.

This was like a very big shock to me. I wanted him back. But then I asked myself some questions. I asked myself can I be with some one who once said shitty things about my family? Can I be with some one who blackmailed me? Can I be with some one who was against my dreams?  Can be with some one who don’t respect me and my opinions? Can I be with someone wasn’t willing to accept me as I am? Can I be with some one who just proposed my friend and said it her from the beginning?

The answer was NO.!

Yes I loved him. And no doubt I still love him. But then there comes self respect in between and I cannot let him insult and disrespect me all the time.

And so I decided to move on. It wasn’t easy. I still think of him. But one thing I came to know that never trust anyone.

Image result for teens crying in darkness

I SUFFERED.

I LEARNED.

I CHANGED.

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